The abundance of now.

by the Artist

I looked out my window and saw a profusion of beautiful Black Eyed Susans that have taken over an old garden. The bluest of blue overhead. The air warm but not wet. A light breeze cooling. It hit me... I am only guaranteed "abundance in this moment". 

We've had a different sort of summer. Our vacation did not turn out as planned. I had spent the winter months planning how I was going to fix up our newest RV. (the playhouse I always wanted as a child I finally got). I set money aside, I had fun outfitting the camper. I just couldn't wait to leave for our very first two week vacation by our favorite lake. Then my mother died and the Carpenter needed surgery. 

With the events of this summer I've been feeling the frailty of life. And it is giving me some anxiety. I normally have a certain amount if I am to be honest. And having your own business adds to that. The Carpenter is much better at being self-employed then me. He handles the highs and lows very well. Me not so much. Oh yeah I said that already.

I walk a fine line on this blog between being transparent about our build life and being positive about our business at the same time. It is a balance. I want to be real. I want to share this crazy adventure. On one hand I can say... we need more work. On the other hand I can say.. we have so much work we need to hire. This isn't for the faint of heart.

But today's epiphany made me realize that all I can do is be in this moment of abundance. It is all I have. We can strive for an abundant tomorrow, a worry free future.. but that isn't realistic. There are just too many things out of our control. 

But I'm beginning to realize that, that is okay. All we have is right now. The future will work itself out. I know that.